You’re about to Skype into a potential JV partner, or talk to a big affiliate on the phone, or meet your fellow marketers at a conference. Making this connection is important – it can mean the difference between years of working together to build your businesses, or not. So, what can you say or do to make them trust you?
Should you try to impress them and wow them with your expertise? Should you be funny and outgoing? Or act like you’re extraordinarily successful?
Really, the answer is none of the above. That’s because the first step in getting people to trust you is to show them how interested you are in them.
Let’s say you’re about to speak to a business prospect. Decide in advance how you’re going to feel about this person. Before you even meet, choose to find them interesting, intriguing, loveable and kind. When you do, you’ll be making them feel as important as they are.
Ask to hear their story. “So tell me how you got to where you are.”
Let it come across in your words. “That’s fascinating, tell me more about that.” “I love hearing your story, tell me what happened next.”
Make your energy and your words positive because no one likes to be around negative people.
Another example: When you see who’s calling on caller ID, get happy and think how fascinating they are before you answer the phone, especially if you’re initially annoyed at the interruption.
Creating a positive experience for the other person will naturally lead to the connection you seek.
Connection occurs in those moments when someone else feels understood by you. When they feel that you “get” them. You might use phrases such as, “Me too!” “I thought I was the only one!” “I didn’t realize you enjoy that, I like it too!”
In that “me too” moment, you help that person remember that they are not alone in this world, and that there is at least one other person that “gets” them.
The more “me too” moments you can create, the more points of connection you create.
Here are more tips for creating connections that get people to trust you:
Get permission before offering them your advice. They might be simply telling you their story and not looking for your feedback, so don’t assume. Invite them to consider whether they want you to participate. You might say, “That’s really interesting. I have an idea that might be helpful to you, would you like me to share it?”
In sales, the word “no” is seldom respected. So ask permission before making a presentation of any kind: “It will only take 5 minutes, if you don’t mind my taking that time to share this with you.” Asking permission shows respect and indicates that you think of them as an equal, not someone to be dominated.
Ask for feedback. When offering them information, ask what they think and how they feel about it. “I’d love your thoughts. “Can you tell me your opinion?” “I feel strongly about that, how do you feel?” “What would you do in a situation like that?” “Have you ever done something like this before?”
Be helpful, even if they’re not ready to buy right now or do a joint venture or promote your product right now. Share resources with them, introduce them to people who can help them, and find ways to be an asset to them, not a liability.
Using these methods you’ll build connections, trust, and you’ll grow your network exponentially, thus growing your business.